Ellen Pearson Gersh is the site manager of the Beacon Friendship Center, part of the Dutchess County Office of the Aging.
How did you start working with seniors?
My father worked for Beacon High School and had the summers off. He believed in helping people who were having hard times, so we would deliver meals to the elderly. I would go to the door and hand them their meal. They were so happy, some of them jumping out of their skin. They’d say, “Ellen, you’re so cute.” I would say, “Oh, thank you.” That’s when I realized that it doesn’t take much to make somebody smile. A few years ago, when I left my role as cantor at Beacon Hebrew Alliance, I thought, “What do I want to do, for what will likely be my last job? I want to work with a population that is being ignored.” Many of the elderly live alone and don’t have a social life. Some don’t have enough food. They want to be seen and heard.
What are some of the more popular activities at the senior center?
They love word games. We’ll do The New York Times Spelling Bee. When they get the Panagram, we all cheer and I give out candy. Or sometimes I’ll put a long word on the board and we’ll see how many words we can find. One time I put up supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. We got 102 words. They were so pleased with themselves. They were saying, “We still got it.” Another popular activity is Joke Day. They love telling jokes, the cornier the better. On National Chocolate Day, Oct. 28, we watched the I Love Lucy episode where Lucy and Ethel work in a chocolate factory. We also had a chocolate tasting. Of course, we do a lot of movement programs, such as dancing. You need to keep the joints lubricated. Cornhole is popular.
What is one of the most important skills you need in this role?
I’m a good listener. Sometimes I’ll call one of my seniors on the phone and say: “It’s Ellen. How are you doing? I’m just checking in. I just want to catch up.” And we’ll talk about lots of different things. Sometimes we’ll talk about the Mets. Sometimes we’ll talk about music. I have a guy who reminds me of my father telling horrible jokes that are so horrible, they’re hysterical,
Many older people seem impatient or angry. Why is that?
When the elderly seem crabby or angry, it’s usually because they’re lonely. They’re realizing that they’ve lost their independence. But to deal with that, just do something fun, even silly. Try playing a board game like Trouble. Why not? Or do an art project like you did in elementary school. Have fun. Be present. Listen to them. They have a lot of great stories. And lots of corny jokes.
How can people volunteer?
We deliver 60 meals a day to people who are bedridden, in a wheelchair or have other needs, so we always need help in the kitchen putting together the meals, preparing the trays and rolling the knives, forks and spoons into napkins. We also need people to lead activities. I have one person who comes every couple of weeks and plays Hangman. It’s very popular. I’m always looking for artists to lead activities for an hour or so. For St. Patrick’s Day. I was thinking of having them paint mugs. Then we’ll all drink Irish coffee — minus the alcohol, obviously.
Ellen does an amazing job with the seniors at the Beacon Friendship Center. I see her once a week to deliver meals and she is so caring with each of them, always doing something fun, putting meals together, directing the volunteers and answering the phone, usually all at the same time! They are lucky to have such a kind , thoughtful person with them daily.